I come from a long line of drinkers.
My grandparent's were the first to abstain but they didn't ever share why. There ability to function as parents were greatly impaired because of their childhoods spent with alcholic parents leaving my mother with no understanding of the 'drink' and hell bent on drinking lots with prescription meds.
Her husband, my step-father, was raised by active alcoholics. He would drink about every 4-6 months with violent tirades each time. He was a domestic violence perpetrator and loved to torture us children rather he was drinking or not. She played the role of judge telling him who should endure the torture each day. Sometimes she would just make things up. This I never understood. Perhaps she was keeping him buisy so he wouldn't beat on her? They have not changed. Their hateful attitudes resonate and I would be in denial if I didn't know I was in danger anywhere within a large radious of their vicinity.
My baby brother is an alcoholic and domestic violence perpetrator who also beats his children. My youngest sister is a crack, meth and alcohol addict who scitzophrenic, 5 months pregnant and living on the streets. My sister closest to my age is a bartender, band member who plays in bars on her nights off, drinks daily and has forced her children to seek other places to live because they got tired of their mother's nightly parties. They complained they couldn't get their homework done or get any sleep because of the drama that comes with a bunch of drunks overnight, and they were tired of stepping over people in the morning before they went to school.
I found recovery 15 years ago and I tried to share. Obviously they didn't listen.
Watching their decline has been a torment.
I really don't know how I escaped other than choosing the streets at 16 over staying within that hell.
It is near impossible to organize an intervention when you are the only one clean and sober.
Now I deal with survivors guilt.